Joel, Moishe House London

Of course what makes a successful Moishe House event, at least for those of us in Moishe House London, comes down to more than simply the number of attendees. That said, all our most successful events - the ones when we've looked back at the end of the night and said, "Wow, that was great, that's what we exist for" - have been when something's caught the imagination of the people out there and they've turned up in numbers. Maybe that's just the starting point...

It's hard to choose just one, but one which was certainly noteworthy was a special 'listening event' during the Israeli-Palestinian conflict in Gaza, in January. The reason I'm picking this one is that people said Moishe House London was the only place they knew that could have held such an event, and it was so needed.

The conflict had been going for weeks now and most people's engagement with it was filtered through the news (TV and print) and expressed via Facebook, where the polemic raged. We felt we should do something but also that it should be different, some kind of counterbalance to all this rage and thunder. Yet it also had to be real and useful, not just full of platitudes and good wishes. What we advertised was an event where people could come and say how they truly felt about what was going on, no matter what their opinion or politics, without fear of it escalating into an argument or shouting match. The question was, how to create a strong enough container to hold different views and how to stop people from shutting down when something is expressed that they find hard to hear?

That was key to the event - asking those questions in advance and planning our approach very carefully. We met and decided, I would run the event and explain from the outset that each participant is to speak for four or five minutes (depending on numbers in attendance) from the heart and for themselves only. It is everyone else's role simply to listen, without comment or reaction. Even when it is your turn to speak, refrain from picking up on previous speakers' points and stick to your honest and heartfelt take, in the moment, unplanned, secure that you too are being heard.

And the event really worked. There were about 25 people - not the biggest but a perfect number really for such an event - and a diversity of opinions. We like the fact that different kinds of people come to us and that night we hosted two Muslims as well as our usual Jewish contingent. Some spoke out in Israel's support. Others said they felt guilt and wanted to galvanise the Jewish community to do more for the Palestinians. Many felt torn. But after everyone had said their piece we held hands and sat in silence for a further five minutes, until I rang a bell to signal the end of the session. Afterwards people stuck around, mingled, chatted and came up to us to
say how much they'd appreciated the evening.

So yes, it was a certain depth of experience that made this event what it was, and a sense that what we were doing was necessary and uniquely Moishe House. We enjoy a freedom to be different, to keep dreaming up our ideal Jewish community events and making them a reality. How lucky we are.